“We love sharing our story. Sarah’s birthmother was adopted, I was adopted, and now Sarah is as well. We want to encourage some normalcy around the topic of adoption. We want young mothers to know they have options, and there are people who want to raise their children. Working with Catholic Charities made everything so easy for us to have Sarah.”
We sat down for a Q&A with the DeLucenay family to learn more about their story.
Q: How did you two meet?
A: Sophomore year at St. John Fisher.
Q: How long have you been together?
A: Inseparable since sophomore year. Finally married in 2011!
Q: Did you always know that you wanted to start a family?
A: Always! I (Mary) was adopted so it was important to us that we also adopt. We think that may have been the reason why Sarah’s mother picked us so quickly because she had also been adopted. Our case worker said it was the quickest decision made by a birth-mom.
Q: Tell us about the adoption process through CFC?
A: We were very lucky with Sarah. We got the call that she was born as we were getting in the car to go to our baby shower. We stopped by the shower to say hi and thank you and let them know we were going to see our baby! At the hospital, there was a sign: “So happy to meet you Mommy and Daddy”. Mary was the first to hold her that day. And guess what … we still have that sign!
Q: How did becoming parents to Sarah change your life?
A: How didn’t it?! We don’t live for ourselves anymore — it’s all for her. Having a child also gives you just another perspective. I was sitting here getting some work done and I happened to look up to see this guy taking photos of his children. I offered to take the picture so he could be in them with the kids. He was so appreciative that he would be in the picture commemorating that moment. Everything is new again when you’re looking at the world through your child’s eyes.
Q: What did you do for Sarah’s first birthday?
A: Our friends and family had been so generous with so many gifts when we brought Sarah home that we really didn’t need any physical gifts. We asked them to donate to Catholic Family Center in her honor instead.
Q: Tell us about Sarah? What’s her favorite color, what’s she like?
A: She is strong willed. She’s “kickin’ butt and takin’ names” as they say. The best way to describe her is through this one picture: She’s in a dress, because she likes to be girly, but she’s climbing a tree wearing her bike helmet. She lived in her bike helmet. She was so close to learning to ride her bike without training wheels last year — and she’s only 3! She loves to sing and will always let you know that purple is her favorite color. She’s funny and super athletic. And her first word was not “dada” or “mama,” no… it was “Holly,” their family dog!
Q: Do you plan to tell Sarah that she’s adopted?
A: Oh, she knows! We didn’t want her to grow up and think that we hid anything from her. And I (Mary) was adopted, so we wanted it to be a normal thing for her. We didn’t want to open any potential for more problems for her growing up, so we’ve always been transparent with her. We pray for her birth mother almost every day.